entropy
at some point or another
i simply need to just stop
i'm watching my life fall apart
one energy drink at a time
and in this nightmare of my own creation
i await for the inevitable
delving into hopelessness
falling into the emptyness
entropy, defined as:
A measure of the disorder or randomness in a closed system.
and i can feel it catching up to me
every day draws closer to equilibrium
acceleration toward entropy
towards a state of equilibrium
the mere threat of accelerating
an entropic course forces intervention
from concerned friends, family, and
mandatory reporters
i've been on both ends of that
and intervention takes too much time
both from the immediate response
and also the consequences of intervention
and i've spent the last few crises in
a superposition of open agony and suppressing
any concern from those that cared
and i supposed this time was no different
I don't have time to deal with this shit
so I need to do what i can to hide
or im gonna get bogged down in a
bureaucratic mess of concern
bottling things up isn't gonna make it better
letting it out publically is not appropriate
and after all that, i find myself numb
i've run out of tears to cry
the bleeding will stops
unless the lysis is too severe to recover from
i yearn for a simpler time
too much on my plate now
an uncontrolled grief
that comes with loss
but not the loss of a person
rather the loss of an idea