Act VIII: Thesis
an act in five parts
starting after
spring break
which broke me again
and im still recovering
cigarettes
insomnia
heartbreak
exhaustion
catharsis
a month and a half of
full bore effort
i had to drop hours
balancing three electives
and my ever-growing project
i picked up cigarette smoking
the bliss caught me at a good
time, and i felt that
maybe, just maybe
things would be alright
then came the insomnia
too many stimulants,
too much work to do
too little time to do it
and so i lost the ability to sleep
catching feelings for her
crying hysterically over
a woman i could never be with
because she, and i
were both taken
worked to utter exhaustion
days in class and work
nights spent trying to unwind
and coming into lab past midnight
to watch the sun rise alongside my results
89 pages.
fourteen thousand words
and on a friday afternoon
i submitted my thesis to my committee
and i was freed
defending my thesis
went absolutely stellar
i did not spend all this time
to be unprepared
mastery over my field
i became the subject matter
expert for an ultraniche
piece of instrumentation
that separated chemicals
a culmination of 2 years of R&D
i passed my thesis defense
then the last day of classes
came and went by so i
submitted my thesis online
on the seventh of may
and that was it.
no fanfare, no triumph.
not even catharsis
on a random thursday
it was over, just like that
only one thing left now.